Remembering Hunter Lee.

It is now 4 days away from what would have been Hunter's 1st birthday if he had survived.  Sometimes I wish I could go back to that day nearly a year ago and just hold him a little longer.  I tried memorizing everything about him, but now, unless I look at photos, some of the things are fading from my memory.  One thing will never fade, I will always love and miss him.  I will always remember his cute and crazy eyebrows too.  Although the pain of losing my 4th and last nephew has lessened, I certainly do miss him!  My SIL had a hard time carrying pregnancies to term (both Justin and Erik were premature and she had many miscarriages in between), so I never got excited about the baby until she reached 20 weeks, then the dreaming and excitement would begin for me.  So when she reached 20 weeks with Hunter, I felt safe thinking about all the fun things we would do with him as he grew.  By 22 weeks though, we knew something wasn't right, but still, I hoped for the best and figured it wasn't something time couldn't heal.  Then at just 24 weeks and 3 days, Hunter came into this world.  He was too small.  The neonatologist's tried to get a breathing tube in, but it just wasn't going to work.  So, they brought him to us and he spent his 2 hours with his family loving him and holding him.  I took so many pictures because I never want to forget his perfect face or his tiny fingers and toes.  The nurses were so sweet and they stamped his hand prints and foot prints onto his birth certificate (he was born alive).  They also made a soft mold of his hands and feet as a keepsake.  They were so sweet and understanding and they were very helpful.  So, these past few days, Hunter has been on my mind a little extra as his 1st birthday approaches.  I'm not sure what we will do in memory of him, but I suspect a little something should be done.  I don't want his big brothers to forget him either.  Well, that's all for now.  Good night.